I'm starting college in the fall. I'm a sarcastic little shit. I love my dogs, 2048, Netflix, and my little country town.
"Tim keeps having me kill his wife in his movies… I don’t know what that means," -Johnny Depp
I love this post
i feel like Tim Burton ships his wife with Johny Depp really hard and writes entire fanfics and AUs about them, then makes those fics into movies
I have a really hot waiter.Guys he came back with my food and said, “Careful the plate is hot too.” So I asked, “too?” and hE TOUCHED MY SHOULDER THEN MADE A SIZZLING NOISE.IM FREAKING OUT WHAT DO I DO.
wanna know what these all say?
"suck his dick"
I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling
IM AT CHURCH CAMP AND THEY ACCIDENTALLY JUST STARTED PLAYING SHOTS OVER THE LOUD SPEAKERS .
THE FIRST LYRICS ARE LITERALLY “ARE YALL READY TO GET FUCKED UP” .
YOU CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO IMAGINE THE FACES OF HUNDREDS OF HOMESCHOOLED CHRISTIAN TEENS UPON HEARING A SWEAR
U DONT EVEN KNOW THE PASTORS JUST CASUALLY KEPT DANCING WHILE THEY STRUGGLED TO TURN IT OFF AHHHHAHAHHA